Day 10

So I'm still waiting on financial aid money...it disbursed to the school on Wednesday, and can take 3 to 5 business days to go into bank accounts from there. I'm hoping it will show up on Monday so I can try to get some last minute stuff accomplished before my first class on Wednesday.
Matt is back to work, and he's on a double today, so I've got the apartment to myself until probably after midnight. I'm hoping I'll be able to get a lot accomplished without any distractions. It is about 2:30 now, and after I'm done writing this I'm going to finish cleaning up the kitchen. I started working on it last night, but really only got the freezer cleaned out and organized. I still need to wash and put away dishes, clean/organize the fridge, organize cupboards, clean counters/microwave/oven/sink/dishwasher, and sweep/mop the floor. I'm hoping I can get that done by 4, and then start working on my reading for school. I need to get the bathrooms cleaned, too, but I'm waiting on that...maybe I'll be able to talk Matt into helping me with that tomorrow, since he'll be out of work. I would really like to get some shopping done and get my bills paid, but that isn't going to happen until student loan money shows up.
I did make some progress charts for Matt and I to use...one that tracks weight loss, and one (for each of us) to track our 52 week money challenge. We decided that we will both do the money challenge, and that our weight loss goal is 50 pounds for the year...about a pound a week. If we get within 10 lbs of the goal, we'll use our combined savings from the money challenge ($2756) for a vacation or something else fun...if not, we'll use to for rent or student loan payments, or something more practical. I figure that losing at least 40 lbs over the course of the next 50 weeks should be doable, and 50 is attainable if we really keep at it. I figure it is a good idea to leave some wiggle room in there, because it may be hard to sustain weight loss at the end of the year during the holidays...if we get pretty close, I'll count that as a win. And we could buy a pretty epic vacation with a few grand...maybe even go oversees somewhere. I want to say my mom and aunt's trip to Ireland cost them around that much, and they went for a whole week. I think tying the two goals together will be a way to reinforce ourselves: if we don't save the money, we can't take the cool vacation. If we don't lose the weight, we have to use the money for something useful but boring. Being excited for the vacation/fun option will remind us why we need to keep working on the weight loss goal. I'd like to pretend that I could lose weight just because I need to, and stay motivated based on internal factors, but I know that is bullshit. The whole "lose weight to be healthy, not to be thin" and "lose weight for yourself, not for others" is great in theory, but that just isn't how my brain works. I love food, and if I have to suck it up and stop eating massive quantities of delicious, bad-for-me foods, I need more reward than "but you'll FEEL better" - yes, I know I'll feel healthier once I've lost weight, but I also feel pretty damn good when eating pizza. So.... Basically, wanting to lose weight for superficial reasons, or just because I can reward myself at the end of the year with something fun - I don't care if those are the "wrong" reasons. I don't think that after I lose the weight I'll gain it back. I know that this means "lifestyle" changes, which can't be superficial or short-term. And I think being thinner and healthier WILL be its own reward, but I do need an external motivator to get to that point. I've never been, and will probably never be, exceptionally thin - but I can maintain a healthy weight. I did through high school and most of college, and really only started to gain weight 3 or 4 years ago. Most of my life I've been a healthy-ish weight until recently, so I know I can maintain a weight of less than 190 if I just work at it. So that is really the goal, getting down to a weight I feel comfortable at, and then doing whatever I need to do to maintain it. Since the initial weight loss and changes are going to be difficult for me, extra motivation is needed.
I finally got my FitBit in the mail, so that will help me keep track of my steps and calories. I used to take it off at night, which would mean I'd forget about it in the morning some days, or accidentally leave it on my clothes and destroy it in the washer. I think I'm going to just move it from my day clothes to my pajamas when I switch over, that way it is always on my person and I don't risk losing/forgetting/washing it. Matt and I have already talked about cutting fast food/eating out down to once a week and making our meals ahead of time, or at least planning them in advance whenever possible. These are small, do-able changes, but I think they'll really make a difference. I'm actually looking forward to getting started.